Monday, August 07, 2006

Mortality

So I was driving down 275 today, minding my own business, when a car comes across the median from the other side of the expressway. This lady must have been going 100mph to fling her car that far. She crosses right in front of me, car on its side, and gets nailed by an F150. The F150 smashes the roof of her car right down into the floor boards and sends the car flying end over end across all four lanes. Needless to say I stop and see the ladies now mangled arm hanging by a thread out the passenger side window. It's the first time I've ever seen anyone die. I'm still a little shook up. Seeing something like that difinitely makes you think...

26 Comments:

Blogger Simon Hawk said...

There's no way to get out of this life alive.

7/8/06 05:36  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

Ha ha. That's from a movie.

7/8/06 05:38  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

I heard it from an ancient country song.

7/8/06 05:40  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

This makes the perfect excuse to take the day off work. Tell them you're too distraught over the morning events, then go home and play video games. That's what I'd do.

7/8/06 06:12  
Blogger Garble said...

That's pretty intense. How close did you come to getting hit?

7/8/06 06:19  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

About 25 ft. That truck hit her car RIGHT in front of me. Had I been going a few miles an hour faster I would have nailed her. That shit will wake you up in the moring. I just heard from one of my drivers and 275 is still closed.

7/8/06 06:26  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

That reminds me of the time Jack and I were just passing a 5th wheel being towed by a large pick-up truck north of West Branch when it flipped over just as we drove past it. If we were like 10 seconds slower it would have landed right on us. It was in the right hand lane and we were in the left. It would have sucked because we were in Jacks ford escort at the time. I'll never forget seeing that thing tumbling over and skidded perpendicular to the highway blocking all lanes.

7/8/06 06:32  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

Oh yeah! I remember that. I have to start being more careful!

7/8/06 06:35  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

Oh shit, and don't forget about flying off of the North Rd. exit backwards at 60 mph. That freaked my ass out.

7/8/06 06:36  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

Jesus, you two are bad luck. The next thing you know a train will derail, there will be a 37 car pile up, and a horde of giraffes will get hit by a bus. You guys should stay off the roads for a while.

7/8/06 06:49  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

I think it's Si's fault. I never had bad luck until I started riding around with him. I think the whole situation this moring is residual fallout from the incidents we've had in the past.

7/8/06 06:56  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

You guys are nuts, it's obviously GOOD luck, if it wasn't neither of us would still alive. You should be thankful that you have residual fallout. Maybe I better sell you some more.

7/8/06 07:00  
Blogger Jim Brannick said...

Mrs. Brannick once saw a couple on a motorcycle get crushed at an intersection. To this day, she won't let me ride a motorcycle- not that I have any desire to do so.
Thankfully, I've never been privy to a car fatality. However, I recently witnessed my first "corpse" (aside from cadavers at funerals). We were assisting in a 'search and rescue' on a reservoir in our district. A couple kids drowned (so it was really just a 'search'). I was on a boat that ended up recovering one of the bodies.

I hope none of you ever have to look upon a dead body that's been under water for 48 hours.

7/8/06 07:02  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

Damn that is nasty, I would have jumped out and swam back to shore. My dad was telling me a story about finding a drowned person also, its not pretty from what I hear.

7/8/06 07:56  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

That's just Mother Natures way of population control. A gust of wind or a rogue tree branch probably knocked them in. But sadly, the number of kids dying each year doesn't exceed the number being born. Hopefuly Mother Nature will take care of that soon, otherwise she won't have a planet left to rule over.

7/8/06 08:06  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

What does killing kids have to do with whales and trees, dickface?

7/8/06 09:15  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

You moron, Mother Nature loves Earth, you can't change that, and the context of the sentence implies that killing kids needs to be done. But after you mention it, I love Earth, and I guess I am a hippy, because Earth-loving hippies do things like dump spent motor oil in the hole in their backyard that's already being occupied by a recliner, rusting tractor, and other numerous rotting things in addition to letting their cats lick old anti-freeze on the garage floor and spraying r-13 refrigerant into the air. Idiot.

7/8/06 09:28  
Blogger Jim Brannick said...

A couple weeks back, someone made the comment that the footer at the bottom of the spoonhouse no longer applies. After Cohort's last post, I beg to differ. I still think this passage is spot on:
"It is partially responsible for shaping some of the demented individuals who contribute to this blog. (Although the Holly public school system is mostly to blame for that.)"

When I wrote that footer, I tried to make it withstand the test of time, much like the Founding Fathers when they wrote the Constitution. But politics is Garble's forte...

7/8/06 10:12  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

The footer's becoming more accurate as the political posts become less abundant.

7/8/06 10:17  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

You idiot, of course I hope she kills off more kids, but the rest of the sentence is just stating the obvious. I was merely laying out her options. Kill kids and keep Earth, or keep kids and kill Earth. Pick and choose biotch. My actions throughout life prove that I in no way condone saving this dump.

7/8/06 10:33  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

Yeah. Lobo is a fucking homo. Anyone who call himself "the Main Man' is a tool. Like guys who have barbed wire tatoos.

7/8/06 10:33  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

Wait, dumbass. That's LOBOT, from Star Wars. Not Lobo. You're an idiot. (Lobo is still gay.)

7/8/06 10:35  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

Wasn't Lobo a wolf thing that lived in a snowy world?

7/8/06 10:36  
Blogger Jim Brannick said...

Fags, Chewie and Leia would not have escaped the clutches of the Imperial Stormtroopers had it not been for the intervention of Lobot and other Cloud City guards.

So, Lobot stays (if for no other reason than to piss you off). That is, until someone comes up with a better original GIF animation. Send it to me, and I will put it on the front page.

7/8/06 10:41  
Blogger Simon Hawk said...

What program do you use to make animated .gifs? I've never tried it.

7/8/06 10:45  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

You have to keep it Jim, just to keep Simon pissed.

7/8/06 10:47  

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