Good points

Some of the rest of them are funny also.
If I’ve met you more than once and, when I address you as “Mr.” or “Ms.”, you don’t immediately say “Call me John” or “Call me Jane” (or whatever your name is), and you’re less than 40 years older than me: you’re a dick.

If you insist on being called “Dr.” and you’re not a real doctor, and I’m not your student: you’re a dick.

If you insist on being called “Dr.” and you’re not a real doctor but I am your student: you’re still kind of a dick.