Friday, July 14, 2006

2006 has to be the worst fucking year in the history of the universe.

I hate 2006. Everything about 2006 blows ass. This has to be the shittiest time period I've ever had the unpleasantness of existing through. What does make this the worst year ever? Maybe it's that apathetic hell hole (my house) where I squander away my very existence by battling away the dragon queen (mom), and constantly re-engineering my room because the dragon queen still feels that I'm in 3rd grade and has to move all my shit on the floor and creep around under my bed because she thinks I'm hiding something because I'm no longer "mommies little baby" and I've moved on and don't need her stupid help and abortive input on every subject known to man. I hate that place and I can't wait to "leave the nest" or if I had it my way, hire somebody to burn the house down. Nah, that can't be it, I've been subjected to that cockslap every day for the last 22 years. Maybe it's shitty Michigan I hate. I used to love Michigan, but now it's turned into a festering dumpster filled to the brim with hobo shit. There are no jobs, the economy sucks worse than a prostitute on Dort Hwy, and the only news around this dump is about Kwame's stupid anus-gas-pocket disease. Exciting. I think that, in conjunction with the piss palace that I work for is what's so irritating. Everything about my work screams archaic. From the urine colored walls and computers (from years of assholes smoking in here) to the dawn of time technology and 600 year old catalogues, it really makes a person wonder why the hell they're still here clicking their life away on these shitty Gateway, Pentium III-equipped computers. Maybe if the atmosphere was a little more professional in here, like getting rid of the dart boards and happy balloon wallpaper, then this place would be a little more tolerable. Oh well, I'll just have to endure this stupid ass year for five and half more months. I wish the universe would explode.

4 Comments:

Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

DERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

14/7/06 08:45  
Blogger Jack T Briggs said...

I think Simon's right. If you don't like it...fucking move. My first year out I may have lived on his couch...but at least I wasn't living other my mother's iron fist.

You were right about one thing...your company is trapped in the 70's!

17/7/06 05:16  
Blogger Cohort Mandibles said...

It's not so much the house that bothers me, it's the business I work at. How am I supposed to move out when I get layed off twice a year for a few months at a time? What a dump.

17/7/06 05:18  
Blogger Garble said...

Cohort, You have my sympathy, it sounds like your life is a living hell.

17/7/06 05:29  

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