Yes! Politics! Now, if they could only put their propaganda into the form of a suppository.

Politics has to be the most idiotic "job" in the world. Watching these Granholm and DeVos morons debate is like watching two retarded kids on a merry-go-round. They spend all their time going around in circles and drooling on each other, and nothing gets accomplished. Ever notice how instead of laying out their plan for saving Michigan, they only prattle on about how the other candidate is an abortion of the human race? So where do our beloved candidates stand on sensitive issues? How the hell am I suppose to know? They won't tell us a damn thing. From what I gathered on tv and radio, they both eat incomprehensible amounts of skin missile. Hello idiots, we already knew you were dickheads, you don't need to waste precious dollars and airtime telling us that the other guy needs to burn in hell. Tell us what you're actually going to do, jerks. So when the momentous decision comes, who do you vote for? Well, at first I wasn't going to vote. But then I decided I didn't want to be unpatriotic to our 42%-unemployment-rating, Canadian-garbage-taking state we call Michigan. So what I decided to do with this election is vote for a 3rd party, off-brand candidate that no one seems to know about. The basis for my vote was to go from how funny or abnormal the candidate's name is. Much to my liking I discovered Bhagwan Dashairya. Who?? That's what I said too when I saw his name on the ballot. So fuck it, that's who I'm voting for. Then, for lack of better things to do, (even at work) I did some research on him and found out a few of his positions, and now I actually have legitimate basis for a vote. Number one position, he wants to ease state restrictions on the purchase and possession of guns. Good, because I'll be damned if I'm going to let burned out, dumpster musk hippies take away my rights. Get a job and take a shower, assholes. Or better yet, murder yourself, the world doesn't need you. Ahh, that transitions nicely into point two: Bhagwan wants to implement the death penalty in Michigan! Finally, we can uncrowd that mare's nest we call a jail system, and free up some taxpayer money. Plus, we all know how much fun it is killing criminals and getting away with it. Good job Mr. Diarrhea, you've sealed my vote.